An Alibi with sexual desire

And if the cinema in love with the women were less blue flower than it appears to with it first of all? It is the assumption of the psychoanalyst Sophie Cadalen (3): “He also answers a more unconscious strategy: to camouflage the “believed” aspect of the desire to make it morally acceptable. The women do not dare, or in any case very seldom, to pose their desire in what it has of crude. They need to shelter behind the alibi of the love, “honorable” goals such as the marriage and maternity. ”

Behind a questioning as apparently romantic as: “You believe that I can call it? You believe that I can show him my feelings? You believe that I can propose a restaurant to him? ”, a second, unconscious hides some: “Does my desire for this man shock you? Do you think that I have the right to sleep with him? ”

The men, them, never pose the problem of the legitimacy of their desire. Culturally, they are authorized, and even encouraged, to show itself wishing. However, they also have their side shopgirl, ensures Nicolas Guéguen, professor of social and cognitive psychology (lireplus low): “But the great difference is that a man does not spend the hours to the telephone with his best buddy to try to decode each word left the mouth its dulcinée, observes it. And it does not call it either in middle of the night to announce to him that it has just fallen on the ideal woman whom it hoped for since always. It waits the following day and says rather: “It is frankly exciting.” ”