The people who are able to carry themselves easily are unaware of at which point most of the time their reaction remains perfectly unjustified. With children for example: to show authority does not imply anger inevitably. Admittedly, in the life it is sometimes good to raise the tone. One feels better after, but it cannot be an art of living under penalty of seeing its entourage taking a runout powder.

“To build itself, the children test the values of life and the values morals of their parents, explains Being useful the Dominique psychiatrist. These are those which one makes them, in manner express or tacit, promotion.

Insinuation: “I prefer speech. ” As if the punishment were an insult with the intelligence of the child… However, Claude Halmos, the punishment recalls, when it is not humiliating and that it is proportional to the fault, is neither an educational “under-tool” nor a form of ill-treatment. “It is essential. The interdict must be learned with the child. If it transgresses it first once, a call to order can be enough. On the other hand, if it continues to transgress, the sanction is essential – each relative having to invent the punishment which seems to him best adapted to the child and the gravity of the transgression. How the child could include/understand the importance of a rule if a punishment does not sanction its transgression? ” It is more than prejudicial, for him and the company, than it grows with the false idea and dangerous that it can badly act as any impunity. Without counting that the relative who speaks instead of sanctioning ends up losing any credibility with the eyes of his child. The punishment is also used to make respect the words of the parents, it gives them weight and direction, and prevents that they are not transformed into inoffensive blah.

“I am afraid of the conflicts”

The family life must proceed in good mood and serenity… The phantasm tempting, and is largely shared, but unrealizable. The conflict is inevitable because the child always opposes the limits, at least initially, and that the confrontation is structuring for him, although he is consumer of energy for the parents. A small child is not civilized: he is dominated by his impulses, the “pleasure principle” and the absolute power; so that it becomes it, it must change its initial operation. And, for that, the authority of his/her parents is essential for him. A child builds himself while being opposed. These divergences inevitably create frictions. For the psychoanalyst, to assume them, without seeking to preserve the peace of the moment, it is quite simply to make its duty of teacher. ?

20 mushers (conducting of sledge) among the best of the world and 280 dogs, true marathons of snows, prepared for this fourth edition of the Large odyssey which remains faithful to its creed: to put forward the bond between the man and the animal, to promote a respectful sport of the environment, this while at the same time with the north pole the motoneiges replaced the sledges. This race of attachment on 1.000 kilometers in the Alps, with 25.000 meters of uneven, is the promise of a spectacle and a relation man-animal out of the commune run.

1.000 kilometers in the Alps

The race proceeds in 10 stages on several fields: from the 11 at January 14, the mushers cross in 4 stages the Field of the Doors of the Sun (High Savoy), will pass to Savoy by the Challenge Megève-Our Lady of Bellecombe (15 and January 16), then finish into High Maurienne Vanoise by a race long distance of 550 km in 4 stages. The opening ceremony to Avoriaz, on January 10 of 14:00 to 19:00, constitutes one strong moment with the arrival of the crews, veterinary controls, and grand opening with 19:00 in the center of the station, the departure of the race taking place the following day with 16:30, with the Falaise district.

Animations “far North”

More than fifty animations are programmed along the two weeks and of the 19 villages crossed by the Large Odyssey, with hot wines, exposures sets of themes, film projection… As for the polar Base of Valley Cenis Vanoise which accommodates the bivouacs of the mushers, it envisages in its animations the construction of igloos, initiation with the sledge, of the nights in tipis, the walks in racket… Last year, more than 3000 people visited it.

Symbiosis man-animal

During the race, each musher has a “pool” of 14 dogs, each one being located by an electronic chip injected under the skin and identifiable by one of the 7 veterinary surgeons present throughout the race. Each stage of the race must be realized with a maximum number of dogs at the beginning, and a minimum number on arrival (for example: 10 dogs maximum at the beginning, 7 minimum on arrival). It is with the musher to appreciate if it wishes to leave (dropper) the dogs tired with checks points envisaged for this purpose along the stages. If there is no check not, it must take them on its sledge but in no case to exhaust them.  The musher pilot only by the voice, it has neither whip, nor of reindeer. This complicity was built with the wire of several years of “work” together. What to confer a magic side on the adventure of the Large Odyssey.

To listen with empathy, not to lower it in front of the others, to recall him which chance one has to be with him. To know that its needs are not necessarily ours. Y attentive being. To accept that it can react differently that oneself in the same circumstances. And to regularly ensure it, in spite of the silence in love imposed sometimes by the humdrum routine with the daily newspaper, that our love does not weaken.Does

The angel had been forgotten on a large rock close to the lake Hertel, a few days after Christmas, by the small Emilie, who had helped her mom to demolish the Christmas tree. She found the angel, which she called Angelito, quite pretty with her small transparent wings, her silver plated dress, her loops color of corn and her eyes blue-sky. Emilie was inconsolable loss of her Angelito and also of the sorrow which she feared to make with her mom. Alas, snow had soon covered the little angel, whose wings had become of ice. But Angelito was not fortunately cold, because the angels never have cold, same the angels of Christmas trees.

*During the long sleep of the winter the angel dreamed with sadness with the beautiful Christmas tree. It had had the choice place, in top at the top of the tree. The fir tree bathed in the glare of thousand small lights and was rocked by the soft music the Festivals. Would this marvelous time return one day?

The heat sun of the spring which makes reappear the flowers and the plants had made a small miracle moreover. It had not only thawed out the wings of the angel but had even succeeded in insufflating a bit of life there. Angelito had been able to take its flight with the birds of spring.
Which happiness for an angel which always had been attached to the top of a fir tree or had been hidden in a box of paperboard. Then, which surprise to discover that on the mountain there were pines and fir trees much more beautiful and more tops that in the living room of Emilie.
Angelito was installed in turn on the giant fir trees. Then the little angel had a daring idea which made leap its cotton heart. Why not organize a festival of Christmas here on the mountain with the beautiful fir trees which pushed there everywhere?

*But the mountain was not badly larger than the living room of Emilie. It was thus necessary to find other angels to be installed on all the fir trees and the pines. Then Angelito began its recruitment in the cities and village around the Saint-Hilaire Mount. It succeeded in visiting hundreds of attics and striking with the innumerable ones of boxes of decorations Christmas.

he angels of all sizes and all colors were magic to leave their hiding-places to go to mountain to prepare a great festival of Christmas. They and they all found a beautiful pine and fir tree from where the mountain with his tops and the large mirror of the lake were seen. The trees were proud to have such smart winged visitors and the birds were at a little envieux beginning. But the angels were discrete and did not disturb the nests of the birds.
But, the maples and the beeches were sad. They did not have angels to decorate their tops.
“Why are we always forgotten during the time of the festivals? They are always the same ones, the fir trees and the pines, which are made decorate and admire. It is not right!”

*Angels, which has as a task to see with the happiness of alive and to take care that all are precisely treated, consulted each other.
“How can we include maples and the beeches in the great festival of Christmas?”
It was not easy, because the angels could not be installed on the small branches of the summits to the risk to fall. The fir trees and the pines had pointed tops. It was quite practical.

Then the angel of Emilie had a brilliant idea.
“My friends, there are also stars of Christmas. They can settle anywhere in the trees”.
The idea was not stupid, then the army of the angels of fir trees decided to turn over to the attics of the area to awake there the stars which had also embellished Christmas trees. It was a raving success. The angels unearthed a star cloud which proudly settled in maples and the beeches.

When angels and stars were practiced to see the effect, the summits of the trees of the mountain seemed covered with a small snow étincelante. They was marvelous and everyone was happy or almost. The angels and the stars which had lived all with many happiness Noëls in the hearths of the area, found that it missed something of important: music. Where to go to seek the music?

The birds were quite ready to sing, but the majority, accustomed to spend the winter to the south, did not have the taste to spend the winter on the mountain to give pleasure with the angels.

*Then the wind, which visits the mountain in all seasons, offered to make its share and to blow in the branches, sometimes gently, sometimes extremely to make a kind of small music. The Blue Titmouses and Jets which remain on the mountain in winter, even offered to lend their voices. With the practice, the effect was not very impressive. Fortunately that the wind, large traveller, knew familiar places where the true music of Christmas found: parkings of the centers of purchases. They would bring the airs of the Festivals to supplement the great celebration
“Ah, misfortune, exclaimed the angel of Emilie, it does not have there gifts under the trees!! There is no Christmas truth without gifts for everyone”.
The angels, the stars and the wind were looked at.
“It is a serious problem. No gifts not of festival!”.
Sometimes of course, the angels, the stars and the wind live all in the clouds and forget to call upon humble land. They had thus forgotten residents quite important of the forest: foxes, shrews, raccoons, squirrels and the hares which had however followed the preparations with a great interest. The squirrels are thus assembled towards the summits to offer the services of the animals of the ground.
“We would be happy to make our share. We can go to seek beautiful rocks and casseroles, which one will put at the feet trees”.
The angels applauded and all was practically ready for the festival.

There remained right to await the arrival of Christmas in a few weeks. They are thus given go for the end of the week before Christmas, because the angels and the stars wanted to then turn over in the hearths, questions of not disappointing people who needed them to decorate their fir trees.

At the beginning of evening, Saturdays before Christmas, the mountain was covered with a beautiful coat of snow. The angels were perched on the tops of the fir trees and of the pines, the stars settled in maples and the beeches, the rocks and the casseroles decorated snow around the trees and the wind brought music of Christmas. This spectacle was impressive, more beautiful than decorations of the most beautiful living rooms of the area.

*The angels made tremble their silver plated wings, the stars vibrated to reflect the light of the moon, the Blue Titmouses and Jets made their small concert and the squirrels arranged the rocks and the casseroles. Everyone worked extremely, very extremely to make spout out the spirit and the joy of Christmas. But in spite of the efforts and the good will, the heart was not there.

The angels were the first to realize it.
“That what is it thus misses? We have thousands of angels and stars, music, gifts and one feels that the spirit of Christmas is not with go. Misery. We nevertheless will not miss the festival of Christmas on the mountain”.
The mountain became quiet. The wings of the angels ceased trembling, the stars became quite quiet, the wind fell and the animals were sad. The beautiful festival did not take place, despite everything the efforts. Soon angels and stars were going to turn over in the hearths.

Then the miracle arrived. People arrived suddenly, close to the lake. They lit fires. A choral society settled close to the small country cottage at the edge of the lake, lit of a crown of torches, and started to sing canticles and airs of Christmas. More and more of people arrived. Parents with children, couples in love one, the elder ones. They had left all their hearths to be found with people of everywhere. Their small families were becoming a large family. They were well emmitouflés to be protected from the cold. They sat down around fires and drank hot chocolate.
Small Christmas was becoming great marvelous Christmas.

*There the angels and the stars felt a heat to invade them, the heat of the spirit of Christmas, the spirit of the division and friendship. Their wings again started to tremble, the stars étincelaient, the wind added its music to that of the choral society, the animals had small brilliant eyes. If the little angels of the fir trees had been able to sing they would be mixed with the choral society the top with the summits.
The small miracle of Christmas was so strong that the visitors packed in front of the choral society and fires, felt in their turn a heat that they had not felt by making their shopping or by decorating their fir trees. Children were the first to notice that the funny ones of white butterflies decorated the tops with the pines and of the fir trees and stars shone well high in maples.
*Emilie, who always sought her dear Angelito, looked at also the tops.
“Mom, mom. Look at up there. It is Angelito!!”
She started to shout
“Angelito! Come, come!!”.
Angelito could not leave the other angels, but it made small safeties with its wings to reassure it. It knew besides that it would be soon of return to the hearth, like the others.

What a festival of Christmas!!
Most extraordinary was that, on the ground and in the summits, of the hearts beat more extremely, of the eyes shone of joy and with secret energies mixed.

Who would have believed that the small Emilie by forgetting the little angel of his fir tree on the mountain, had transformed the mountain into a place of festival for the men, the women, the children, the angels, stars, the wind and the animals.
Instead of singing “the angels in our campaigns” one could entonner this evening “the angels in our mountain”.

After the festival on the mountain, the cotton little angels and the sheet stars hastened to turn over in the houses which they had left to make benefit all the hearths from the area of their merry presence. They were going to spread the spirit of division and friendship which had reigned on the mountain of Saint-Hilaire in this marvelous evening a few days before Christmas.

*The fir trees, the pines, the maples and the beeches hope to re-examine every year their marvelous visitors and the wind is ready to go to seek the most beautiful music.

The men also are made their cinema

Nicolas Guéguen, professor of social and cognitive psychology at the university of Brittany-South and author of 100 Small Experiments of psychology of the seduction, dismounts some generally accepted ideas on the love with the masculine.

““Has which moment are you seen that you had fallen in love?” American researchers posed this simple matter to several hundreds of individuals, reports Nicolas Guéguen. Eh well, the men declared themselves in love more quickly than the women: as of the fourth meeting for 20% of them, against 15% of the women. At the end of twenty meetings, only 30% of the men acknowledged anything to feel, against 43% of the women! This study proceeded in the years 1970 and I think that today, with the rehabilitation of the expression of the emotions, the number of men in love as of the fourth go would be even more important. In fact, the men often have a more idealistic vision of the love than the women. Contrary to much of them, in their daydreams in love, mainly, they grant very little importance to the incomes and the social status of the other. ”

Fantasmer the other is an activity common to both sexes. The specialists in psychism however agree to say that it is particularly intense side woman. The hypertrophy of imagination in love female is explained several manners. Initially, traditionally, the love is held for the business of the women. Then, “high during centuries from the point of view of the Good match, the women remained programmed to dream the Great Meeting, condition supposed of their happiness”, points out the psychotherapist Sylvie Tenenbaum (1). “A long time,
the culture maintained them in position of waiting, supplements Genevieve Djénati (2), psychological clinician. Locked up in their kitchen, the women had only their daydreams waked up to try to include/understand what their husbands carried out outside. ” Thus, to resist the trouble and to project themselves in an existence more exciting, they had to develop their imaginative potential. Those which feel reluctant to be made films of are not deprived: they are afraid to give each other false hopes. “I avoid making me films, I am too afraid to leave in gimlet, acknowledges Claudia, 37 years. I fear that my daydreams bring me too far and I do not want to be disappointed by have hoped for the beautiful story and to have idealized the other. ”

“From which place do you come? ”: it is precisely the first question put by Francoise Bernard, council in formation, psychoanalyst and creative of this method of orientation and accompaniment of projects. On a white sheet, I write: “Of Belgium”, and I add without really reflecting: “Fuzzy Country where the sky, the ground and the sea merge. ” On this country left here ten years, on these a little vague roots on the side of the North Sea, I decide to make the starting point of my initiatory play. The first wire of my history.